Thursday, November 8, 2012

I know the Stork did not bring that baby!!

I remember growing up and all my cartoons would show a 1950's looking couple waiting for their baby to arrive and a stork would come flying in and drop a baby in a basket at the front door or fly in the bedroom window and leave the baby in the crib. Then the couple would all of a sudden hear the cries of their baby and run to the door or bedroom and gasp with joy. Reality check! As I grew up and found out the reality of where babies came from....I wish the Stork was real! So 3 kids later I am pretty sure I got the system down. I laughed when I found out I was pregnant with our last one because my husband was like.."The minute we get a kid out of our bed (my son was sleeping in our bed every night and finally we got him in his own bed) you get pregnant!"  I always felt that having kids with horrible sleep habits was the best birth control ever!! So now as our youngest wakes up every night and hops in bed between us, my husband really does not complain much!

 I am at my daughter's school the other day volunteering and there was another woman there who was clearly very pregnant. During our conversation it came up that she had twins at home and as my brain is processing the fact that she has a child at the school in Kindergarten, twins that are 18 months and ready to deliver another one she throws in the fact that there still is also a 3 year old in the mix. I am totally in shock and of course need to ask a million nosy questions. I am all for kids and family life because I am also the mother of 3 kids, but I have some age gaps between them and the 3rd was our OMG surprise child, and we then were like we got it and are well aware of where babies come from and I don't care if the birth control or surgeries out there say 99.9% effective :) So I get back to my conversation and have it all lined up that this woman has a 5 year old, 3 year old, 18 month old twins...TWINS and one coming any day. I know this is very exciting to some people and she seemed really happy, but it took all my strength not to ask the really important question!! I wanted to ask, so are all these babies the result of having sex with your husband or does the Stork really exist!! Good lord...I wanted to tell this woman not to ever talk to my husband because I finally have him convinced that no couples out there with multiple kids are having sex regularly:) I do not need my cover blown for cripes sake. As I ended my volunteer session and wished the woman luck I felt like I should be handing her an award or something.

As I drove home I could not help thinking again how a couple with that many young kids find time to have more if you know what I mean. I have kids and I know how crazy my household is and I am finally out of the baby and toddler stage all together and I still want to collapse in bed every night and sleep...just sleep! I still cannot even pee or shower without a kid or dog opening the door, let alone staging time for a romantic interlude. So I picture this woman with a 4 year old and 2 year old at the time and like 10 month old twins doing baths and tending to melt downs and cleaning up from dinner and getting them all asleep at a decent hour and then walking into her room tired and still covered in food wiped on her from her kids dinner and saying "Man I really feel in the Mood!"  I laughed to myself as I thought of how I would tell my husband that it really takes almost a year for a woman to fully recover from having a baby and I would find articles to support this logic. That's my story and I am sticking to it!

If you see any Storks flying around let me know!

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